Why do I write?

I have had several people ask, what made you decide to write a book?

About five years ago I felt a little unrest in my soul. I had given my life to the Lord and was serving in every capacity I possible could at that time, yet I yearned to do more. I wanted my own ministry, something I could nurture and grow.

That is when I began an open dialogue with God. I needed his guidance, to make sure I was doing what he wanted me to do, to glorify Him and His kingdom. Originally I thought being a missionary was the answer but after much prayer I received an answer I did not like. No. Just a simple word, no explanation just, no.

Let me admit right here and now I’m a bit of a rebel and do not like to be told I cannot do something. So I prayed more and questioned God’s decision to not allow me to share His words with others through mission work. Here is the funny thing…God knows us, better than we know ourselves. After much prayer (serious whining) God revealed to me why he told me no.

See, I really like my earthly home comforts. A cozy bed, warm running water, a Walmart and fast food joint around every corner. You know the awesome things we take for granted most of the time. So God kind of called me out and reminded me that although my heart was in the right place my dedication would waver once I lost my worldly goods. Ouch. Point taken.

God was right, mission work would not be something I would do on a normal basis. Still my soul felt uneasy. I prayed again for guidance from God on what I should do. This time God asked me an unusual question. ‘What is it that you would do to glorify me?’

Now that question took me aback if I were to be honest with you. Deep down I know what I always wanted to do but there had been this voice who told me I wasn’t good enough. That a girl like me who was raised in a little bitty country town in Kentucky could never be…a writer. Especially a girl who took such a destructive path most of her adolescent and young adult life. (I’ll share more about that in time.)

Dare I ask God my hearts truest desires? What would he say? But then I realized something, God knows our hearts, He wanted me to acknowledge my hearts desires to Him. I thought of Adam and Eve, God asked their location when they hid from Him once they introduced sin into their lives. He knew where they were and the mistake they made. He wanted them to acknowledge it to Him. This is what he did for me, admitting what I wanted was uncomfortable, but looking back now I realize in my discomfort my trust in God grew.

He made me realize maybe that voice was right all those years ago. I wasn’t good enough, not then. But what I want you to see is when I asked God for my writing ministry I had something that I did not have before. I had God, His voice is more mighty than the one that plagued me years before. He made me aware that when I began to write for Him it would not be for fame, money, or my glory but it would be for Him and to raise awareness of His goodness to those who may not yet know His amazing grace.

So you ask why I write? I write so that those who do not know his mercy and grace may find Him among my words and receive the hope and peace only our King can deliver.

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